Horse Sale Terminology Deciphered!

Horse Terminology is another language. If you don't know the meanings you could get a pig in a poke. What's a poke? It is not enough to read between the lines, especially if the lines make no sense. And the chronic refrain is, 'I've never seen him do that!' Yea, sure. I've tried to decode them the best I can:


Event Prospect = Big Fast Horse, no brakes
Dressage Prospect = Big Slow Horse
Hack Prospect = Pretty Color
Sporting Prospect = Short Fast Horse
Camp Prospect = Fast Horse which can turn
Reining Propspect = can't ride him outside of the arena
Jumper Prospect = Can't keep him in the pasture
Endurance Prospect = Fast Horse that will go until dinner time
Halter Prospect = likes to be groomed, can't be ridden
Lots of Chrome = Blaze and White Socks
Flashy = White Socks
Attractive = Bay
Half-Halt = try to get the horse under control by pulling on the reins, over and over and over
Foxy Ears = pinned ears
15.2hh = 14.3hh
16.2hh = 15.3hh
To Loving Home = Only Expensive
To Show Home Only = Very Expensive
Needs Intermediate Rider = bucks like a PRCA saddle bronc champion
Needs Experienced Rider = Potentially Lethal
Elegant = Thin
Easy Keeper = a week away from Foundering
In Good Condition = Foundered
Great Broodmare = Couldn't do anything with her, bred her instead
Big Trot = can't canter within a two mile straight-away, wear a good bra
Nicely Started = longes, but we don't have enough insurance to ride him yet
Top Show Horse = won a reserve champion 5 years ago at a show with unusually low entries due to tornado warnings
Home Bred = accidental breeding because we didn't think this would happen
Well Bred: mother and father are also brother and sister!
Big Boned = good thing he has a mane and tail, or he would be mistaken for a cow
No Vices = especially when he wears his muzzle and gets ACE'd regularly
Bold = runaway
Good Mover = runaway
Athletic = runaway
Free Moving = Bolts
Quiet = Lame in Both Front Legs
Dead Quiet = Lame in All Four Legs
Good in Traffic (Bombproof) = Lame all Round, Deaf and Blind
Stud Colt = Needs to be gelded yesterday
Loves Children = Kicks and Bites
Friendly = Nips
In Your Pocket = aggressively searches for treats, should work for TSA
Excellent Disposition = If you keep feeding him treats he won't bite you
Color Is Black = brown and/or dirty
Pony Type = Small and Hairy
Arab Type = Looks startled, has a bashed in face
Very Typey - looks like a cartoon version of a horse
TB Type = Skinny, Looks Terrified
Quarter Horse Type = Fat
Warmblood Type = Big and Hairy
Draught Type = Big and Exceedingly Hairy
Easy to Catch = Very Old
Spirited = psychotic
Handy With His Feet = kicks
Free to good home = can't get him loaded on the trailer to take to auction
Must Sell = Wife has left home and taking kids
For Sale Due To Lack Of Time = rider cannot afford to spend anymore time in the hospital
All Offers Considered = I am in Traction for 6 months
Well Mannered = hasn't stepped on, run over, bit, or kicked anyone for a week
Professionally Trained = hasn't stepped on, run over, bit, or kicked the trainer in 30 days
Recently Vetted = someone else found something really wrong with this horse
Any Vet Check Welcome = Please pay for us to find out what is wrong with him!